What did the bread say before it jumped into the toaster?

I'M BREADY TO DIE"

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Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Where do puppies go when they die?

Back into the microwave so I can get in another round.

What do they call deers in space?

I don't know, they would probably die anyways.

Bread Jokes More Bread Jokes

What's a redneck's favorite type of bread?

Inbred

Why does Germany have so many different kinds of bread?

Well, we had to do something with the ovens.

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?

Stew. Bonus: what do you do if an epileptic jumps into a jacuzzi? You throw in your laundry.

Why hasn't Mexico won any medals in the Olympics?

Because all the Mexicans who can swim well, jump high and run fast are in the United States.

Toaster Jokes More Toaster Jokes

What did the toaster say to the pop tart?

I want you inside of me.

What's the difference between a whale and a toaster?

You didn't pop out of a toaster.

I'm Jokes More I'm Jokes

Whatcha doin?

Papa would say, "I'M MINDING MY OWN DAMN BUSINESS." Best advice ever.

What did one fish say to the other during the race?

I'M GOING TILAPIA!!!