I can't believe someone would stoop so low.
From a catalogue. ba dum tss
Women. They heavier they are, the easier they are to pick up.
To run their hands through their hair
Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck!
Dogma
When he was told to "go big or go home," he only had one option. (I've posted this joke here before, but I believe I've been the first, so if you recognize it as a repost it's because I wanted to tell it again!)
God doesn't think he's a police officer.
Police police police police police police police police police police police.
because the steaks are too high.
Because they keep stepping on the string.
I wrote to my North Korean pen pal "I can't complain" he wrote back.
Applicant: Well that depends, what's the complaint? Interviewer: He's complaining that his burger had onions on it, even though he specifically asked they were to be removed. Applicant: Well I'd start by telling him he's in the retail section.
Jimmy Carr Jokes(http://thatswhatwedo.iobad.com/post/859629085/jimmy-carr-jokes)
