Why do midgets refuse to wear tampons?

Because they keep stepping on the string.

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Step Jokes More Step Jokes

What goes cluck, cluck, cluck, boom?

A chicken stepping on a landmine.

Why do elephants jump across rivers?

So they won't step on the fish.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why are you wearing a tuxedo?

The man responds "If I'm going to be im-po-tant, I want to look im-po-tant!"

Who Conquers All *obviously, this is read in the man's grizzled voice* What's the difference between your mother and a motorcycle?

When I ride a motorcycle... I wear protection.

Tampon Jokes More Tampon Jokes

How can you tell a woman is having a bad day?

She has a tampon behind her ear and can't find her cigarette

What do you do when a box kotex catches on fire?

throw it on the ground and tampon it.

Midget Jokes More Midget Jokes

What do you call a midget in a subway saying, "tick...tick...tick..."?

A metro-gnome

When is it okay to kick a midget in the balls?

When he tells you that your wife's hair smells good.

Refuse Jokes More Refuse Jokes

What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league?

Rink injustice!

Why did the surgeon refuse to dress for work?

He didn't want no scrubs

String Jokes More String Jokes

What do a Marionette User and Tampon Thief have in common?

They both pull strings for work. (Inspired by Bo Burnham, this popped into my head the other day)

What do you call a relationship that never works out between guitarists?

No strings attached