What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and is on fire?

Bernie.

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What is the fastest way to get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?

A. Wave at her.

What do you call a man on your porch?

Mat. I neglected to mention he has no arms or legs.

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What's a man idea of helping with the housework?

Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.

What do they have for lunch at Monster School?

Human beans boiled legs pickled bunions and eyes-cream.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How can a man go 7 days without sleeping?

Sleep at night

What do you call a man with a double decker bus on his head ?

The deceased !

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

Why don't hypochondriacs... Why don't hypochondriacs use lighters?

They're afraid of catching fire!

Why was the driver fired from the destruction derby?

He was accused of wreckless driving.

Bernie Jokes More Bernie Jokes

Whats the most stupid thing you've seen a Bernie Sanders supporter do?

Vote for Bernie in a primary.

Why does Bernie know he'll win the elections?

Because his good friend Nostradamus told him he would.