What does E.T. stand for?

Freedom of speech

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

What has two legs and can't stand up?

Half a cat

What if Stephen hawking was the real slim shady?

but we would never know because he couldn't stand up

E.T. Jokes More E.T. Jokes

What's the difference between E.T. and a Mexican?

E.T. learned English and went home.

Whats E.T.'s first name?

Yodela

Freedom Jokes More Freedom Jokes

What does your s*** smell like?

Freedom.

Why aren't there any knock-knock jokes about freedom?

Because freedom rings. Bazinga!

Speech Jokes More Speech Jokes

Why does Bernie always hold the podium while giving a speech?

It's tough to stand on your own when you have no spine.

Why was the schwa bad at giving speeches?

He said "uhh" way too much.