What gift do you want?

HUSBAND: "An English girl." After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: "Where is my gift " WIFE: "Wait for nine months!"

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

When I see a "How am I driving?

sticker, I want to take the driver in my arms and tell them that I too have questions about my existence

What did the vulture say when the airline agent asked if he wanted to check his luggage?

No, thanks, it's just carrion...

Gift Jokes More Gift Jokes

What's the gift that keeps on giving?

AIDS

What do you give a kid with no hands for Christmas?

Doesnt matter, he'll never unwrap the gift

Month Jokes More Month Jokes

What is the Rebel Alliance' least favorite month?

The Imperial March.

What about Fox News?

They haven't shown a fox in months. (Craig Ferguson)

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Why don't you ever callout my name when we're making love?

Husband: "Because I don't want to wake you."

What do you call a women who always knows where her husband is?

A widow

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

Why does jesus not play video games?

Everytime he dies he has to wait 3 days to respawn

Why was the Redditor mad at Reddit?

Because it made her wait seven minutes before posting something.

English Jokes More English Jokes

What's the difference between E.T. and a Mexican?

E.T. learned English and went home.

What's the longest word in the English language?

A native Texan saying, "Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttt."