About 45 pounds. What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend 45 minutes
A washing machine won't follow you around after you dump your load in it.
God doesn't walk around thinking he's a doctor.
Engage.
When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh
She's52" "Haha, dude, she could be your mom!" "Yeah, actually it's yours"
The ones that are hot don't last as long
Because a girl on the ground said "I have a boyfriend" later that day the nuke fell into depression
To sharpen the knife
The only improvement you can make is getting undressed.
Because a black widow has no husband.
Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
He prefers his gut when it's down 45 pounds, and his junk when it's up 45 pounds.
