What's the difference between Jared from Subway's gut and his junk?

He prefers his gut when it's down 45 pounds, and his junk when it's up 45 pounds.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between CNN and Al Jazeera?

CNN shows the missiles taking off and Al Jazeera shows them landing.

What's the difference between a racist and a liberal?

Gullibility

Prefer Jokes More Prefer Jokes

What kind of body do you want to have?

ME: *leans in close* I'd prefer human

Why does Gandalf prefer coupes?

Because other cars have Mordor.

Gut Jokes More Gut Jokes

Why wouldn't the skeleton jump off the cliff?

A: Because it had no guts.

Why did the zombie cross the road?

To get his guts back. My three year old made that one up, I though it was pretty good :)

Subway Jokes More Subway Jokes

What is the Taliban's favorite holiday footwear?

Missile Toe!

What does Santa Claus and Jared from Subway have in common?

They both leave kid's homes with empty sacks.

Jared Jokes More Jared Jokes

What's wrong with little Timmy?

Mom, sad): He went to Jared.

How did Jared lose 40 pounds?

He dumped his girlfriend

Junk Jokes More Junk Jokes

What's the difference between a kid and a drawer?

A drawer won't scream when I force my junk into it.

How does a Tyrannosaurus Rex scratch it's junk?

It squats down on a Triceratops.

45 Pound Jokes More 45 Pound Jokes

What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

About 45 pounds. What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend 45 minutes

What's the difference between Jared from Subway's gut and his junk?

He prefers his gut when it's down 45 pounds, and his junk when it's up 45 pounds.