What's the difference between a singer-songwriter and a puppy?

A puppy eventually grows up and stops whining. Thanks to PuddinHead742 for this one.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a police baton and a magic wand?

Ones used for cunning stunts.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?

A: When you lay a brick it doesn't follow you around for two weeks whining.

Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

Why won't Apple's new MacBook sell well?

because it has NO FANS!!! (get it no fans ... thank you!! don't forget to tip your server.)

What do you call someone who can't find a job?

A Psych major. (Pls list your own response - if you're awake and in America at this time, you should have a pretty good one). Thanks.

Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

What did the puppy say when he sat on sand paper?

A: RUFF!

What's the difference between a puppy and a kernel of corn?

Nothing. They both explode when nuked in the microwave.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What's the difference between a drunk driver, and a stoned driver?

The drunk driver will drive right through a stop sign. The stoned driver will stop and wait for it to turn green.

Why did users stop coming to r/jokes?

Because their jokes weren't very funny.

Grow Jokes More Grow Jokes

Why did the excluded tree grow?

To be long.

What's the 4th grade essay in the Detroit School District?

What I want to be *if* I grow up.

Whine Jokes More Whine Jokes

What's the difference between a Pilot and a jet engine?

A jet engine stops whining after it lands

What's the difference between a surgeon and a puppy?

If you put a puppy in a room by itself for an hour it'll probably stop whining.