Whine Jokes

What should you never do in front of an alcoholic?

Whine.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What's the difference between a Pilot and a jet engine?

A jet engine stops whining after it lands

What do you call a 20 year old spaceship that whines all the time and never wants to run properly?

The Millenial Falcon.

What's the difference between a singer-songwriter and a puppy?

A puppy eventually grows up and stops whining. Thanks to PuddinHead742 for this one.

What does the new socialist leader of France mean for the country, Europe, and the world?

Nationalized wine.. Sounds like the right wing will have some whine too.

Whats the difference between the FAA and a jet engine?

The engine stops whining after the plane lands.

What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?

A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

How does the captain know the aircraft is safely at the ramp?

Both the engines and the co-pilot stop whining.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?

A: When you lay a brick it doesn't follow you around for two weeks whining.

How do you know that a plane from the UK has landed?

An hour after its landed its still whining.

Why do little boys whine?

Because they're practicing to be men.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Coffee Mug

What's the difference between a surgeon and a puppy?

If you put a puppy in a room by itself for an hour it'll probably stop whining.

What do you call a worker in America that will work hard for reasonable pay and never whine?

An immigrant.**

What did the parent say when the little girl was whining?

A: Leave it to peave her.

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20 Year Old Jokes More 20 Year Old Jokes

What do you get if you cross a 20-year-old man, and 37 steak knives?

25 years in prison

What's the difference between a 6 month old and a 20 year old?

About 6 garbage bags and 30 gallons of formaldehyde.

World Jokes More World Jokes

Why is China so politically in bed with Africa?

Because China is the biggest coal burner in the world

What did Putin say when the world got mad at him for invading the Ukraine?

Cri-me-a river!"

Engine Jokes More Engine Jokes

What kind of ears does an engine have?

Engineers

Where did the engine go after he retired?

To live in a motor home

Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

Who's the only one who doesn't say thanks on Thanksgiving?

The Turkey.

What does A&ampW stand for?

Amburgers &amp Woot Beer! Edit: Thanks to my dad for this one.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas?

Cancer

What do you call a kid who's dad is Jamaican and mom is Chinese?

Rastafriedrice

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

What can I do to stop my addiction?

She said, "Whatever means necessary." "No it doesn't," I said.

How many communists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: None. Each lightbulb contains the means of its own revolution.

Europe Jokes More Europe Jokes

What do you call a Zen master from eastern Europe who's been bugging you all day?

A Buddha Pest.

What does the new socialist leader of France mean for the country, Europe, and the world?

Nationalized wine.. Sounds like the right wing will have some whine too.

Captain Jokes More Captain Jokes

What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet?

The Captains log

What did captain Kirk do in the head?

He Shatner.