What's the difference between a surgeon and a puppy?

If you put a puppy in a room by itself for an hour it'll probably stop whining.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a Bull Dyke and a Bull Elephant?

about 100lbs and a flannel shirt

What's the difference between a pirate and a necrophiliac?

I'm not sure, but they both go out with shovels to find the booty.

Puppy Jokes More Puppy Jokes

How do you get a puppy to stay the same size forever?

You stop feeding it.

What's the difference between a puppy and a kernel of corn?

Nothing. They both explode when nuked in the microwave.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Whats the difference between a goat and a kid?

I stopped butchering goats.

What do you call a cow that stopped producing milk?

An udder failure.

Room Jokes More Room Jokes

Where are the posters?

WIFE: THEY JUST DISAPPEARED! In other room *cat is furiously stuffing missing dog posters into paper shredder*

What's a room full of saurkraut?

Over-krauted.

Hour Jokes More Hour Jokes

Why did Bill Murray's cameo have a sore back?

It had to carry the new Ghostbusters movie for almost two hours.

Why me?

for the full hour.

Whine Jokes More Whine Jokes

What should you never do in front of an alcoholic?

Whine.

What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?

A: A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

Surgeon Jokes More Surgeon Jokes

Why did the surgeon refuse to dress for work?

He didn't want no scrubs

What's the difference between a surgeon and God?

God knows he's not a surgeon.