What's the worst part of locking your keys in the car by the abortion clinic?

Having to go inside and ask to borrow a coat hanger

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why couldn't the accountant keep his car in working order?

Because it broke down and he couldn't budget.

Why was the car naked?

It was missing a tire.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When your boss asks you "do I look stupid to you?

it's a rhetorical question I know this now

How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a light bulb?

2...and don't ask me how they got in there. (My 87 year old grandma just told me this one)

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

How do painters stay warm?

They add another coat.

How does Samsung know its most loyal customers?

They check with the burn ward. (I'll get my coat)

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What is your location?

Me: And you're to blame 911: Pardon Me: You give love a bad name 911: I'm hanging up

What's the worst part of a Ukrainian gas station?

When you see the tongue drag across your windshield.

Lock Jokes More Lock Jokes

How do you prove that your dog loves you more than your wife?

Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.

What do you call 32 white people locked in a closet?

A captive Cherokee.

Key Jokes More Key Jokes

How do you tell the difference between the staff and the inmates at a psychiatric hospital?

The patients get better and leave. Not everyone of the patients thinks he is God. The staff have the keys!

How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?

A: Be too drunk to find your keys.

Abortion Clinic Jokes More Abortion Clinic Jokes
Borrow Jokes More Borrow Jokes

What are some products of the West Indies?

Student: I don't know. Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.

Why is there a broom in the driveway?

me: So your mom doesn't have to borrow the car