What time is it when an elephant sits on your car?

Time to get a new car.

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What do you call a Mexican whose car has been stolen?

Carlos

When you wife asked you to buy her car, why did you buy her a diamond instead?

Because I couldn't find a fake car."

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

How many "All Lives Matter" protesters does it take to change a light bulb?

None, because they keep on asking why all of the other light bulbs in the house aren't being changed at the same time.

What did they say about the guy who woke up and jerked off on his alarm clock every day?

He always came on time.

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

What do a plum and an elephant have in common?

They're both purple except the elephant.

How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed ?

When your nose touches the ceiling !

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What's pink and sits on a piano chair?

Elton's John

What do you calll a woman that people sit on ?

Cher !

New Car Jokes More New Car Jokes

How does a white lady fix a flat tire?

She buys a new car.

Why do americans get manuals when buying a new car?

I thought they only drive automatic