Why did the alcoholic quit his acting career when the audience jeered at him?

He couldn't handle his boos.

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Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the cyclops quit his job as a teacher?

He only had one pupil.

Why did Julius Caesar want to quit politics?

All that backstabbing was too much for him.

Boo Jokes More Boo Jokes

What rhymes with 'boo' and really stinks?

You. Why I oughta...! Edit: Wow, thanks for all the love. My son is quite the character and he really caught me off guard with this!

What did the french baker ghost said?

BOO! Langerieeee!

Handle Jokes More Handle Jokes

Why can't people in wheelchairs be looked at for too long?

The can't handle stares.

How do you think we can better handle this in the future?

ME glaring at Cheryl, who took the last donut: idk, maybe don't hire Cheryl

Alcoholic Jokes More Alcoholic Jokes

What do you call an alcoholic with Parkinson's?

Shakespeare (say it out loud)

What did one alcoholic say to the other alcoholic?

I forget

Audience Jokes More Audience Jokes

What's the difference between a Blues musician and a Jazz musician?

A blues musician plays 3 chords to audiences of thousands. A jazz musician plays thousands of chords to audiences of 3

How does Times Square start the new year?

By having Mariah Carey drop the ball! "The audience can sing this one."