Why do programmers like to concatenate time stamps?

It's the only way they can get a string of dates.

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Like Jokes More Like Jokes

How do you know the universe likes Saturn?

It put a ring on it.

What's the difference between a goldfish and a mountain goat?

Goldfish like to muck around the fountain.

Programmer Jokes More Programmer Jokes

Why did the programmer get a job working with big data when his wife died?

He just needed a little bit of Clojure.

A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.

A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

How does Sean Connery find his way to the toilet?

With a shat nav.

Why did the Chinese almost lose in Mulan?

They had way to many chinks in their armor.

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

Whats the difference between me and a calendar?

A calendar has dates.

Whats the best part about dating a black girl?

You rarely have to meet their dad.

String Jokes More String Jokes

How did the unqualified harp player get into the orchestra?

She pulled some strings.

How did the puppeteer meet the President?

He pulled some strings.