Console Gamer Jokes

Why did the console gamer cross the road?

To render the other side.

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Why do console gamers use their in game names in real life?

They haven't got anti-aliasing.

Why did the console gamer get a headache at the art museum?

Too many frames.

Why did the console gamer cross the street?

To render the other side.

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Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

What does an insomniac, agnostic, dyslexic spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

What is best potato?

Latvian potato is best potato. Is kind you spend whole life looking for. Also, low calories.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a black man and a couch?

A couch can support a family

What's the difference between jelly and jam?

Nobody would name their band Pearl Jelly.

Headache Jokes More Headache Jokes

What do trees take when they have a headache?

Aleve.

What's white, digs holes in your garden and helps with headaches?

A paracetamole!

Week Jokes More Week Jokes

Why did the physicist move across the street from the haunted graveyard?

To observe spooky action at a distance! Thank you, I'll be here all week.

What's the difference between a blonde and a washer?

When you dump your load in a washer, it doesn't follow you around for a week.

Real Life Jokes More Real Life Jokes

What did Brad Pitt in Seven and Harvey Weinstein in real life both get?

Gwyneth Paltrow's head.

What's the difference between Jesus in real life and Jesus in a picture frame?

It only takes one nail to hang up Jesus in a picture frame.

Street Jokes More Street Jokes

Why did the bible cross the street?

To get to the other genocide.

What's a one way streets favorite band?

One Direction

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

How do you find a blind man on a nudist beach?

It's not hard...

Who's the artist you find in the supermarket?

Salvador Deli

Switch Jokes More Switch Jokes

Why did the nuke switch course?

Because a girl on the ground said "I have a boyfriend" later that day the nuke fell into depression

Whats an Italians favourite part of football?

Half time, they get to switch sides again