Dwayne Johnson Jokes

Which wrestler's weakness is the rain?

Dwayne Johnson

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What do you get when you have Tiger Woods, Stephen Hawking, and Dwayne Johnson in the same room?

An Animal, a Vegetable, and a Mineral.

Why doesn't Dwayne Johnson's downstairs neighbor understand references to current events?

He's been living under The Rock.

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Diet Jokes More Diet Jokes

Why did the sasquatch go on a diet?

He didn't want to be Obeast.

Why did the lizard go on a diet ?

It weighed too much for its scales !

System Jokes More System Jokes

Why did Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have to change his diet?

Because his nutritionist said he had too many minerals in his system!

What is the digestive system?

The digestive system is a system which starts with one hole and ends with one hole

Rock Johnson Jokes More Rock Johnson Jokes

Why did Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have to change his diet?

Because his nutritionist said he had too many minerals in his system!

Why is Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson always so sad?

Everyone takes him for granite.

Rock Jokes More Rock Jokes

What does a rock put on when it stinks?

Geodorant.

Why would you throw a rock at a Mexican man riding a bike?

Because it's probably your bike. Why would you throw a rock at a black man riding a bike? Because it's probably your black man.

Rock Star Jokes More Rock Star Jokes

How does Dwayne Johnson Party?

Like a ROCK Star.

Why did the rock star fail his depressing math exam?

He couldn't get the saddest fraction.

Dwayne Jokes More Dwayne Jokes

Why is Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson always so sad?

Everyone takes him for granite.

Why did Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have to change his diet?

Because his nutritionist said he had too many minerals in his system!

Nutritionist Jokes More Nutritionist Jokes

What do you call a nutritionist who sidelines as an automotive journalist?

A carb-o-rater

Why did Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson have to change his diet?

Because his nutritionist said he had too many minerals in his system!

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

Why did I break up with my vegan girlfriend?

She refused to swallow animal by-products.

Why can't we feed the animals?

Wife: They'll get lazy and dependent and never, ever go away. Me: *looks warily at our kids*