Kevin Hart Jokes

Why is Kevin Hart the opposite of Michael Schumacher?

His life improved after he met the rock.

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Which president likes doing laundry?

George WASHING-A-TON. He's the 8 year old white Kevin Hart.

When can a woman make you a millionaire?

When you're a billionaire (Credit to Kevin Hart)

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

What do you tell someone who feels that life has shorted them from a purpose or calling?

You belong.

What is the one riddle that everyone gives up?

The riddle of life!

Improve Jokes More Improve Jokes

How can transportation be improved in Harlem??

By moving the trees closer together.

Why are highly successful people named Mark always so depressed?

Because they can't stop hitting themselves. This joke came to me while I was half asleep this morning. I'm not sure how original it is. I probably heard some variation of it somewhere and have just forgotten. Any suggestions for improving it?

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why are women like magazines?

They have a lot of issues

How does a woman show she's planning for the future?

Plastic Surgery.

Rock Jokes More Rock Jokes

What's the best music to listen to while stoned?

Rock.

How do you put a baby to sleep?

You rock them. What if it doesn't work? Use a bigger rock.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What's the difference between a goldfish and a mountain goat?

Goldfish like to muck around the fountain.

How are the Mafia and the Amish similar?

They both don't like wires

8 Year Old Jokes More 8 Year Old Jokes

What you call toes that taste like mint?

Tic-tac-toe! My 8 year old daughter made this one up.

What kind of cell phone reception do astronauts get on the moon?

1/6 G My 8 year old son came up with this one.

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

Where did I meet these crazy people?

But then I think "What would I do without them "

Where did Santa meet his wife?

Conjunction junction, they specialize in hooking up words, phrases, and Clauses

A. Jokes More A. Jokes

Why were India kicked out of the Soccer world Cup held in England in 1966 ?

A. Every time they were given a corner, they built a shop."

What's the difference between a dead bagpiper in the road and a dead country singer in the road?

A. The country singer may have been on the way to a recording session.