Venetian Jokes

How do you make a Venetian blind?

Poke him in the eye

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What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds?

A zebra!

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How do you tell when a girl really wants you?

When you put your hand down her pants you think you're feeding a horse.

How do you hire a horse?

Put a brick under each hoof!

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why should you wear a condom when writing C++ code?

It's full of std vectors.

What are you wearing?

ME: *nodding and sniffing myself* Mashed potatoes with gravy.

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What is the first thing a blind man says?

My eyes! My eyes!

When she read the order back to me she said, "So, you have one thick sausage, anything else?

I looked her dead in the eye and replied, "Yes, I also ordered a pizza."

Poke Jokes More Poke Jokes

How does the stork bring babies?

It pokes holes in condoms.

Why did God make pubic hair curly?

So we don't poke our eyes out.

Zebra Jokes More Zebra Jokes

Which is the oldest animal?

Zebra. Coz they are still living in black and white.

What do you call a striped bra?

A zebra.