How do you tell when a girl really wants you?

When you put your hand down her pants you think you're feeding a horse.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why doesn't Aaron want to get out of the water, even though he is hydrophobic?

Because he enjoys living in denial.

What N word do you not want to call a black man?

Neighbor

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do you think you're doing parking your car there?

Motorist: I thought it was good place. It says "Safety Zone."

What do you call a man who thinks women are easy to lie to?

Deceased

Horse Jokes More Horse Jokes

What do you call a horse that has been kicked out of his house?

Unstable

How did horses get to America in the 1700's?

On the Hayflower!

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why shouldn't you tell secrets when a clock is around?

Because time will tell.

How do you make God laugh?

Tell him your plans.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

How can you tell if a loaf of bread is a boy or girl?

Feel around for the dough nuts

What did the boy pee say to the girl pee?

Urine angel.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What did both the bomb expert and the digital clock maker say to their mother?

Look, Ma! No hands!

What's wet and wiggly and says how do you do sixteen times?

Two octopuses shaking hands.

Pant Jokes More Pant Jokes

Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?

In case they get a hole in one!

What did the tailor say to his customer after shortening the length of his pants?

A-hem!

Feed Jokes More Feed Jokes

Why don't cannibals have dogs?

Because you're not supposed to feed them people food.

Why can't we feed the animals?

Wife: They'll get lazy and dependent and never, ever go away. Me: *looks warily at our kids*