How do you turn lead into gold?

Start a war.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What does a conspiracy theorist say when he breaks up with someone?

I think we should start seeing other sheeple."

How do you start a powerful woman's movement?

Laxatives.

War Jokes More War Jokes

How'd you die?

I got shot trying to save my fellow soldiers lives in war. You " "I got trampled trying to save on a flat screen" "Oh.."

What is the French verb that means "To declare war"?

Surrendre*

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

How do you know?

My phone is turned off.

What do Philadelphia Eagles fans do after they win the superbowl?

Turn of madden and go to bed. (I'm an eagles fan)

Gold Jokes More Gold Jokes

What do pirates say when they find buried treasure?

Thanks for the gold!

What did King Midas say to the centaur?

Stay gold, Ponyboy.

Lead Jokes More Lead Jokes

What day of the week did the 1st calendar day ever fall on?

Do the math! Me: Seriously ! It's 2AM and I'm leading a meeting tomorrow

Why don't they sell GPSs in Italy?

Because all the roads lead to Rome.