How my girlfriend stay's thin. Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin?

She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.

Previous Random Joke Next
Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why did the hipster burn his tongue drinking tea?

Because he didn't wait for it to be cool.

What's the difference between smoking weed and burning the koran?

If you burn the koran, you can only get stoned once.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Where do you see yourself in 2020?

I DON'T KNOW I DON'T HAVE 4 YEAR VISION!!!!!!!!!!

How is a man like a snowstorm?

A: You never know when he's coming how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

Why did the banker dump his girlfriend?

He lost interest.

When is the appropriate time to kick a midget in the balls?

A: When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What's your favorite part about being a stay-at-home mom?

Me: Showering is optional Her: HAHAHA, be serious. Me: Ok, no drug tests.

What do you call it when you second guess your decision to book a stay at a Native American resort?

A reservation reservation reservation. Credit to Brian Regan, this is my favorite joke of his!

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

Why did the crab jump out of the water?

Because the SeaWeed..

Why hasn't Mexico got an Olympic team?

Because the ones who can run, jump and swim are already in the U.S

Wanna Jokes More Wanna Jokes

Why does all Turkish men have a mustache?

because they wanna look like their mother.

How do you propose to a stoner?

Marriage, you wanna

Calorie Jokes More Calorie Jokes

How my girlfriend stay's thin. Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin?

She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.

Why did the arsonist go to the gym?

To burn some calories.

Conclusion Jokes More Conclusion Jokes

Why did the introduction and the conclusion break up?

They were just never on the same page...

My older brother always tore the last pages of my comic books, and never told me why.

I had to draw my own conclusions.