What did the Illuminati say when they tried to read someone's mind, but failed to do so?

Curses, foiled again!"

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Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

What do you get in the Netherlands, when you fail your driving test three times?

A yellow license plate.

Why did the Buddhist photographer fail at taking pictures?

Bad cam'ra

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What's your best mattress joke?

Trying to win a new mattress in a contest and I need a clean mattress joke to win (dumb, I know)

What do you get when you cross-breed a shark and a cow?

I have no idea but I wouldn't try milking it.

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What did the elevator say to the stairs?

Never mind, I'll escalator

What do your mother and a marathon have in common?

They are both doable as long as you don't mind following a bunch of black guys.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What's black white and read all over?

A: A newspaper.

What is Juan's favorite book to read?

Tequila Mockingbird

Curse Jokes More Curse Jokes

What do you call a buyer that likes to curse?

A cusstomer

Why doesn't Oedipus curse?

Because he kisses his mother with that mouth

Foil Jokes More Foil Jokes

What did the Illuminati say when they tried to read someone's mind, but failed to do so?

Curses, foiled again!"

How long does it take a tweaker to go shopping?

An hour 5 minutes for the Ramen noodles and foil. 55 minutes to fix the squeaky shopping cart wheel.

Illuminati Jokes More Illuminati Jokes

What would happen if the Illuminati and Half-Life 3 agreed with each other?

Illuminati and Half-Life 3 conformed.

What do the Canadian Illuminati call themselves?

The Illuminat-Eh!