What kind of engine did you put in it?

cut to me filling my car with tomato soup* Me: Um... A fast one.

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What car did the Apostles drive?

Hint:Acts 2:1 KJV)

Why did Walt Disney visit a mechanic?

He wanted to get his Car tuned

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What do you do if you accidentally cut off your cat's tail?

Take him to WalMart. They are the largest retailer in the world.

How do Mexicans cut their pizzas?

With Little Caesars

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of ANIMAL would DO this?

Well, that's a gazelle Jeff, so probably a lion *to other ranger* Jeff's new here

What kind of dog did the sad cantaloupe get?

A melon collie!

Fill Jokes More Fill Jokes

How do you know when you're turning 40?

When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh

Why did cavemen pull their women around by their hair?

Because if they had pulled them by their feet they would have filled up with mud

Engine Jokes More Engine Jokes

How long has your car been doing that?

Me: Hubs: The engine smoking at a stoplight Me: I dont know, I look at my phone at lights.

Where did the engine go after he retired?

To live in a motor home

Tomato Soup Jokes More Tomato Soup Jokes

What kind of engine did you put in it?

cut to me filling my car with tomato soup* Me: Um... A fast one.

How can you tell the difference between a can of chicken soup and a can of tomato soup?

Read the label.