What's the difference between the US and Russian Presidents?

US presidents get shot while Russian presidents take shots.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a sandwich and a baby?

Doesn't matter, they both taste the same.

What's the difference between a feminist and a trash bin?

The trash gets taken out once a week.

Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

Where do the Russian separatists go to complain about their lives?

Crimea River

Why did the chess master order a Russian bride?

He needed a Chech mate!

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

How do you stop a dog from barking in July?

Shoot him in June.

What do you do when you see your neighbour staggering in the back yard?

Shoot him again.

President Jokes More President Jokes

Whats the difference between a Russian garbanzo bean and a Russian chickpea?

A president has never been blackmailed into treason over a video of him paying to have a Russian garbanzo bean on his face.

Who would you like for president in 2020?

Anyone who doesn't have poor visions.

Shot Jokes More Shot Jokes

What do you call a skank playing "H.O.R.S.E?

She missed two shots, so she's a ho. I'll leave now.

Why did Kennedy throw his head back?

He was taking a shot.

Russian President Jokes More Russian President Jokes

What does the Russian President enjoy having on his fries?

Putine...

What do you call it when the Russian president sits on a box of crackers?

Putin on the Ritz