What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas?

Forty feet of track - all straight!

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Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What is better than getting a N64 on Christmas?

Getting a N64 now

What does the nationalist sing at Christmas?

Jingo Bells.

Foot Jokes More Foot Jokes

How would you order a Subway footlong in metric countries where they don't have feet?

By crawling to the counter " GET OUT

What's the difference between a podiatrist and a drummer?

The podiatrist bucks up your feet.

Set Jokes More Set Jokes

What is atheism?

A non-prophet religion Edit: Replace the word "religion" with "set of beliefs" if you're picky about that sort of thing

How are you going to pay the Chihuahua who helped you to set up your computer?

With dog diskettes!

Receive Jokes More Receive Jokes

Why did the movie critic give the movie he received on a burned disc a 3.14/5?

Because it was pi-rated.

Why do health magazines targeting hypochondriacs have so much trouble maintaining subscriber levels?

Because none of their readers believe them when they receive a warning that it's their final issue.

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

How many trains have you derailed to date?

I replied "It's hard to keep track."

Why is it so hard to keep track of counting in Afghanistan?

Because of the Taliban (say it out loud)