Who gets the job of writing the fortunes in the cookies?

I want that job. I could really screw with some people.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did Chris Benoit quit wrestling?

He wanted to hang with his family.

Why don't you ever wear your hair down?

Me: It makes me look approachable. CW: So Me: I don't want to encourage that.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

It's a really obscure number and you've probably never heard of it.

How many spiders does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do people call Miley Cyrus in Europe?

Kilometery Cyrus

Why do people like r/citrus?

It's sublime

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why are there so many black people in Detroit?

It's because they heard there was no jobs there.

What's the difference between cancer and a black guy?

Cancer can get jobs

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

Why did the blonde write "TGIF" on her shoes?

A. To remind her that "toes go in first."

What's the best thing about twenty-two year olds?

There's twenty of them. It's better said then written.

Fortune Jokes More Fortune Jokes

What do Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both spent a fortune making their noses more white.

What is a dolphin's favorite TV show ?

Whale of fortune !

Cookie Jokes More Cookie Jokes

Who ate all the cookies?

5-year-old: Ninjas. Me: I didn't see them. 5-year-old: No one ever does. Checkmate.

What did the third cookie say as he reached the pavement in safety?

Crumbs!