Why are you hitting that spider?

wife: I don't like spiders me: Ooooh *grabs newspaper* mother-in-law leaving I don't have to take this

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What does Apu say when people leave him to browse reddit?

Thank you, Karma gain

What did the fancy cat say when he wanted to leave?

Le meow

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why are Eskimos always alone?

Because they like being ice-olated

What are the blonde's first words after 4 years of college?

A: "Would you like fries with that "

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

How do you stop a lawyer from drownng?

Shoot him before he hits the ground

What is the difference between a baby and a alarm clock?

You only have to hit the alarm clock once to make it be quiet...

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

Why did the mother feed her newborn lamb?

Because it's baby food.

What kind of dance does your mother do?

The MOMbo.

Law Jokes More Law Jokes

How do you want your mother-in-law buried or cremated?

Hmm No risk do both.

What is the difference between in-law and vultures?

Vultures attack first, when you are dead.

Spider Jokes More Spider Jokes

What kind of doctors are like spiders ?

Spin doctors !

Which web developer enjoys finding bugs?

A spider!