Why do people congratulate you when Mom is the one making the baby?

Me: I helped 5: How Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions

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People Jokes More People Jokes

Why are sinks depressed?

People look down on them.

What should you do when people talk behind your back?

Fart

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

Why is there a broom in the driveway?

me: So your mom doesn't have to borrow the car

When I was 3 years old I looked at my nutsack and asked my Mom "Are these my brains?

Not yet," she replied

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What do you call a really really big ant?

A GIANT! Now what do you call a baby ant an Infant! What do you call an ant thats into business A Merchant! please post more ant jokes if you know of any.

Who's bigger, Mr. Bigger or Mr. Bigger's baby daughter?

The baby, because she's a little bigger.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

How about a dirty one as well?

Want to hear a clean joke? Bob took a bath. With Bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? (Punchline hidden so you don't accidentally read)

What is cosmetics?

ANSWER: Cosmetics is a woman's means for keeping a man from reading between the lines.

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

What do you call a Black Guy surrounded by 5 White Guys?

Toby

What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet?

The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

How are you going to pay the Chihuahua who helped you to set up your computer?

With dog diskettes!

What's red like a strawberry, hard like beef jerky, smells like vinegar, and is found under your bed?

Me neither. Help.

Instruction Jokes More Instruction Jokes

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

What are instructions?

Correct."

Congratulate Jokes More Congratulate Jokes

Why do people congratulate you when Mom is the one making the baby?

Me: I helped 5: How Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions

How do you congratulate a fighter after winning a match?

Good jab.