Why does vampire Superman want to go out?

Because he doesn't want to be around the crypt tonight. (you can tell i made that up)

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Where are the colored printers?

I said "Dude... it's 2014, you can use whichever printer you want"

Want to hear a joke about construction?

Nah, I'm still working on it.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell a blonde is being unfaithful?

A: Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for penicillin.

How do you electrocute a blonde?

A: Tell her to demonstrate the proper usage of an electric chair.

Tonight Jokes More Tonight Jokes

What is the most offensive joke you know?

I'm bored tonight and I have a no holds barred sense of humour. What are some of your worst

What is your best sushi-related joke or pun?

My dad and I are going out for sushi tonight, and he has rescheduled this dinner with me several times for dumb reasons (one night was because he randomly decided to go out drinking instead). Would love to get my revenge by making sushi puns and jokes all night, but Google is failing me--I've only been able to find jokes that either make no sense, or are just not funny at all. Help!

Superman Jokes More Superman Jokes

What is the difference between Spiderman and Superman?

Peter Parker can swing a web. Clark Kent.

Why is Superman wanted by the police?

He is wanted for being the Man of Steal.

Vampire Jokes More Vampire Jokes

Why did the Vampire's girlfriend break up with him?

Because he was pain in the neck!

What does a vampire call a used tampon?

A teabag.

Crypt Jokes More Crypt Jokes

How does the Mummy plan to destroy Superman?

He's gonna lure him in to the crypt tonight.

Why does vampire Superman want to go out?

Because he doesn't want to be around the crypt tonight. (you can tell i made that up)