Why would my wife ask if I was wearing this shirt when it's already on?

Stop talking in secret code.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did you name your son Tinnitus?

I don't know, me and my wife just thought it had a nice ring to it.

What's the difference between talking to your wife after you forgot something and a minefield?

You can actually get through the minefield alive.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What do you call a little person who can talk to ghosts and just escaped from prison?

A small medium at large.

Why can't the sun talk?

First post) It doesn't have an ellipse.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What's the difference between a cry baby and Dallas Cowboys fans?

Eventually the baby stops crying

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods?

Santa stops at three Hos.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why was Gollum executed at a bar in Iraq?

Because he asked for Ice-es

What would she do for $20?

Wasn't there a joke before posted about asking what a girl would do for $20 or something A dirty joke I'm trying to find it but I can't....

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What does a Scotsman wear under his kilt?

The codpiece he made out of his girlfriend's face.

Why couldn't anyone hear Hellen Keller scream?

She was wearing mittens.

Shirt Jokes More Shirt Jokes

Why does the German dad scare all the other kids?

Because he is ein Brtiger! The shirt should say it all. And I'm considering getting one.

How about this one?

Psychic: That shirt is too small. Employee: You didn't even try it on. Psychic: I'm a medium.