Occupant Jokes

What is a NYC nanosecond?

If you are stuck at a red light, its the time that it takes for the occupant of the car behind you to honk his horn when the light turns green.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Coffee Mug

What was the Italian hot tub that was so small it's occupants always bumped into each other called?

Ja-scusi.

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Blacksmith Jokes More Blacksmith Jokes

Why are blacksmiths seen as very nosy?

Because the are always metal-ing.

What do you call it when a blacksmith makes something white?

Irony.

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What's a fundamentalist Christian's favorite type of car?

A convertible.

What's the difference between driving a car on an empty tank of gas and having diarrhea?

One you're running on fumes, the other you're fuming with the runs.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What's stronger, fifty watts of sound or fifty watts of light?

I don't care but would you please stop screaming, turning the lights on and off.

How do you turn an airliner into a boat?

Allahu Ackbar!**

Spray Jokes More Spray Jokes

What did the Pink Panther say after he sprayed raid on an anthill?

Dead ant. Dead ant. Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant.*

Whatever shall we do?

Let us spray!" replied the other.

Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

Why are a lot of Italians named Tony?

Because as they got on the boat to leave Italy, they were stamped on the head, "TO NY".

What do you call an Italian mobster who specializes in cold coffee drinks?

Al Frap-Pacino

Smith Jokes More Smith Jokes

Why are there so many Smiths in the phonebook?

Because they all own telephones

What could possibly make moviegoers forget about Will Smith's movie After Earth?

A Concussion.

Red Light Jokes More Red Light Jokes

What did the green light say to the red light?

I love you, but I'm sick of yellow light always breaking us up.

What is a NYC nanosecond?

If you are stuck at a red light, its the time that it takes for the occupant of the car behind you to honk his horn when the light turns green.

Light Jokes More Light Jokes

What lights up a football pitch at night?

A football match.......

Why do stoners love English?

Because it's lit