Rosie O'donnell Jokes

What Does Stephen Hawking have in common with Rosie O'Donnell?

Neither of them has anything going on below the waist.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

How do you get Amy Schumer, Rosie O'donnell and Lena Dunham to move to Canada?

Piece of cake.

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Amy Schumer Jokes More Amy Schumer Jokes

Why couldn't Barbie get pregnant?

Because they cast Amy Schumer and Ken couldn't get the job done.

Why did Amy Schumer go to a psychic?

Because it's the only way she'll ever get near a medium.

Waist Jokes More Waist Jokes

What has arms but can't move them?

A small child paralyzed from the waist up.

What do you call a cardboard belt?

A waist of paper.

Stephen Hawk Jokes More Stephen Hawk Jokes

What do you get when you have Tiger Woods, Stephen Hawking, and Dwayne Johnson in the same room?

An Animal, a Vegetable, and a Mineral.

Why doesn't Stephen Hawking need a wife?

Because he has his own shoulder to cry on. Edit: all credit goes to /u/Earleebird who posted it in a comment in /r/oldschoolcool

Piece Jokes More Piece Jokes

Why did a footballer take a piece of rope onto the pitch ?

He was the skipper !

Whats the most addictive drug you can formulate out of a piece of the human body?

Hairoin

Cake Jokes More Cake Jokes

What did the cake say to the knife?

You want a piece of me !

How easy is it to get stoned in Amsterdam?

It's a piece of cake.

Canada Jokes More Canada Jokes

What type of pasta is no longer used in Canada?

Penny ...

What do you get when you let 25,000 Syrian refugees into Canada during the winter?

Isisicles

Lena Dunham Jokes More Lena Dunham Jokes

What do Lena Dunham &amp ISIS have in common ?

They both love stoning women.

What do Lena Dunham & ISIS have in common ?

They both love stoning women.