Whack Jokes

What is the biggest similarity between the average Redditor and a lumberjack?

They both sleep all night and whack all day!

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What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?

A golfer goes "Whack, crap!", and a skydiver goes " Crap, whack!".

What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver?

The home golfer goes WHACK! "Oh no!" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa

What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad sky diver?

The bad golfer goes ::Whack:: "Damn it!" The bad sky diver goes "Damn it!" ::Whack::

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened to the body builder ...whose favorite gym closed down?

He was depressed.

What happened to the dinosaurs that first was aware of the metheorite?

The where petrified.

Crap Jokes More Crap Jokes

Which plant talks the most crap?

Shiitake mushrooms.

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

Skydiver Jokes More Skydiver Jokes

What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver?

The home golfer goes WHACK! "Oh no!" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa

What's the difference between a bad golfer, and a bad skydiver?

The golfer goes " Damn!" The skydiver goes "Damn! "

Lumberjack Jokes More Lumberjack Jokes

What is the biggest similarity between the average Redditor and a lumberjack?

They both sleep all night and whack all day!

When the lumberjacks sawed down the tree where did the Gorilla hiding in the uppermost branches land?

Nearby - the Ape-lle doesn't fall far from the tree!

Mafia Jokes More Mafia Jokes

What does an aging Mafia boss do for his birthday?

Forget about it.

What do you get if you cross a Sociologist with someone in the Mafia?

An offer you can't understand.

Miyagi Jokes More Miyagi Jokes

What does Mr. Miyagi do when he gets home from a date?

He wax off

What Job will Mr Miyagi take on when he retires from Martial Arts?

Plastic Surgeon. Japanese accent "Rax on, Rax off"

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between your mom and a drug dealer?

Your mom can wash her crack and re-sell it.

Whats the difference between a watermelon and baby?

One's really fun to smash with a sledge-hammer and the other is just a watermelon

Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

Where do we go?

Me: Left Axl: Where do we go now Me: Straight. Axl: Oh, where do we go now Me: Damn it, Axl, let me drive!

What makes fish smell?

One fine morning in Eden, God was looking for Eve, but couldn't find them. God saw Adam and asked where Eve was? Adam replied, "She's down at the Ocean, taking a bath." "Damn," says God, "now all the fish will smell."