A DHCP packet walks into a bar and asks for a beer.

Bartender says, "here, but I’ll need that back in an hour!"

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What does the neckbeard say when asked what he did last weekend?

M'laundry."

When I walked to the register with the condoms the clerk asked "Would you like a bag?

I replied "No, she's not that ugly"

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why are those two men standing in the spine of that book?

It must need Osteo-per-o-sis" Love it.

Why is picture of Jesus better than Jesus himself?

You only need one nail to hang up the picture.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

What does the man say when he walks into the bar?

Can I please get a drink "

What do you call a party thrown by a Terrorist at a bar on a hot day in Hawaii?

A-lou-AK-bar.

Beer Jokes More Beer Jokes

What's a man's idea of a balanced diet?

Beer in each hand!

What did the German physicist call his beer mug?

Ein stein.

Hour Jokes More Hour Jokes

What's the difference between mayonnaise and sperm?

Mayonnaise doesn't hit the back if my girlfriend's throat at 60 miles per hour.

Why did the crowd watch the man futily attempt to blend oil and water for hours on end?

It was unmiscible.

Bartender Jokes More Bartender Jokes

What did the brown dwarf say to the bartender?

I'd like a Corona, please.

What did the straight edge ghost say to the bartender?

No boos for me.