How do Russian sprinters train?

They put a bottle of vodka 100 meters away from them.

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Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

What's the best language to describe the hectic holiday shopping season?

A: Russian

Why is everyone in the Soviet Union always in a hurry?

Why is everyone in the Soviet Union is always in a hurry? They're all Russian.

Train Jokes More Train Jokes

Why don't you take a train?

Monster: I did once but my mother made me give it back.

How do you get a Charmander and a Metapod on a train?

You poke 'em on.

100 Meter Jokes More 100 Meter Jokes

What's the worst thing about running 100 meters in less than 10 seconds?

Being black.

What's Isis' favorite race?

The 100-meter daesh. Q: What's Isis' favorite punctuation mark? A: The em-daesh. Q: How much cinnamon does the Isis recipe for gingersnaps call for? A: Just a daesh.

Bottle Jokes More Bottle Jokes

What's the biggest similarity between a bottle of Draino and a Danish stripper?

They both slowly remove clogs.

What does an orphan and a bottle of champagne have in common?

They both lost their pop.

Vodka Jokes More Vodka Jokes

What's a Jedi's favorite brand of vodka?

Skyy. Only Sith deal in Absolut.

What did the bartender day to the man who was drinking his vodka to fast?

Stop "Russian"