How do you scare a man?

Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What do you do when your wife starts smoking?

Slow down and apply lube

Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

is just not as challenging since she started using foursquare.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why do women and children evacuate first in an emergency?

So the men can go on Reddit and repost this joke.

Why did the man get a job as a horse handler?

He wanted stable employment

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

What do you call someone who throws up after drinking too much orange soda?

Fantastic

What the hell is this?

Turkey bacon. *throws tray against wall* I'm hungry! Not desperate!

Sneak Jokes More Sneak Jokes

How long have we been married dear?

Me: How dare you try and sneak maths into this.

Why aren't the Eagles worried about big cats sneaking up on them?

They know there ain't no way to hide those lion eyes.

Scare Jokes More Scare Jokes

How to scare parents?

Dad: "Can I see your report card, son?" Son: "I don't have it." Dad: "Why?" Son: "I gave it to my friend. He wanted to scare his parents."

What's the difference in the KKK and the Supreme Court?

The KKK dresses in white and scares the hell out of black people, the Supreme Court dresses in black and scares the hell out of white people.

Rice Jokes More Rice Jokes

Why doesn't Spiderman like rice?

It reminds him of Uncle Ben.

What's the difference between a musician and a bag of rice?

The bag of rice can feed a family of four.