What did the IT guy say to his wife after she complained about their love life?

Did you try turning me off and on again?"

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why couldn't the Engineer Manager screw his wife?

Sorry I don't have the tools, I only supervise."

Why did the mathematician bring home 24 eggs from the grocery store?

Because when he asked his wife how many eggs to buy, she said 4!

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

How do you turn an old dishwasher into a snowblower?

You give her a shovel and tell her to get to work.

What do these shoes do?

GLINDA: Send you home D: Lame tries new pair And these G: Wait- D: clicks heels turns into hamburger

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What do you call someone who claims to do drugs to try to look cool?

A marajuannabe.

Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney?

Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

How do you stop a North Korean tank?

Shoot the guy driving the cardboard box.

What did the guy Zebra say to the girl Zebra?

Take ze bra off.

Complain Jokes More Complain Jokes

How many feminists does it take to screw in lightbulb?

It doesn't matter how many you get, because all they'll do is sit around complaining about how misogynistic the use of the word "screw" is.

How Many Friend Zoned Men Does It Take To Screw In A Lightbulb?

None, they just all stand around complaining that it won't screw!

Love Life Jokes More Love Life Jokes

How's your love life?

Well, I went on a date. 45 minutes in I realized it was a turtle in a wig. "I'm sorry man" it's ok. still got laid.

What is the difference between God and my love life?

Some people think God is real.