What is the definition of diplomacy?

The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.

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Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What do you call a person that worships NASCAR?

A racist!

What is the one type of person that will never get angry?

A nomad.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What, why?

is it my hair Her: no Me: MY LOOKS! Her: no, it's your personality Me: oh thank god

Why gypsies boys let their mustache to grow?

To look more like their mom.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Whats a mile long and has a thousand arms?

The train to Auschwitz. Some German guy i used to play Path of Exile with told it to me.

What do you tell a slow tomato?

what Ketchup

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

What's the difference between a Chemist and a Plumber?

The way they pronounce "unionized"

How about some snappy one-liners?

Ironically, the only way you could get me to watch 50 shades of gray is if you tied me up and forced me to watch it.

Definition Jokes More Definition Jokes

What's the definition of the perfect woman?

Four feet tall, fold back teeth, flat head so you can rest your beer on it, and turns into a pizza at midnight.

What's the definition of a school report?

A poison pen letter from the principal.

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

What the hell is a steering wheel doing there?

the pirate replies: "Arr, it's been driving me nuts"

What do you get when cross a black man and a octopus?

I don't know but I'm sure he could pick the hell out of some cotton.

Trip Jokes More Trip Jokes

Why was the drug dealer late?

Because he tripped

Why did Night fall?

Because Day tripped him.

Ability Jokes More Ability Jokes

What's the Top Job Requirement for Deep Sea Diver Position?

Ability to work under pressure.

What's the difference between "choice" and "choose?

Choice" is your ability to make decisions, "choose" are what Mexicans put on their feet.