What is the difference between a Mother and Wife?

One woman brings you into this world crying and the other ensures you continue to do so.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a farmer?

A farmer shucks between fits.

What is the difference between 400 dead babies and a watermelon?

I don't have a watermelon in my garage.

Cry Jokes More Cry Jokes

What's the difference between a cry baby and Dallas Cowboys fans?

Eventually the baby stops crying

Why people cry during the weddings?

they are preparing for whats coming afterwards

World Jokes More World Jokes

Why are topologists on a world of their own?

They think on a whole different dimension.

Why did you leave me here all alone?

Where o where are you tonight? Why did you leave me here all alone? I searched the world over and thought I found some one You met a zombie and pblblthpth you were gone.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why is she so loud?

Wife: That's how she talks. Apparently she speaks fluent pterodactyl.

What makes a grown man cry?

Watching his wife and children die before his eyes.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do phone books and women have in common?

They both couldn't vote before 1920

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

What's the best way to bring out your inner child?

A coat hanger

Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring?

The referee said he wanted a clean fight. :D

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

When I was just a little girl I asked my mother, what will I be?

Will I be pretty Will I be rich Here's what she said to me No

Whats the difference between Love and Herpes?

Your mother didn't give you love.

Continue Jokes More Continue Jokes

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing! They just WAVED. SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Let MINNOW if you are not getting it. SHELL I continue?? No?.. I guess I'll stop WHALE I'm ahead. Thanks ladies and gentlefish

Where does Lance Armstrong go to continue his education?

http://cms.bsu.edu/

Ensure Jokes More Ensure Jokes

Whose excercises will ensure that you will never win a fitness award?

Leonardo Di Cardio

What's the best way to ensure that Asia's senior citizens' pension programs are financially sound?

Sufficient amount of youth in Asia.