What's the difference between your mom and a washing machine?

If I dump a load in a washing machine it doesn't follow me around for the next few weeks.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between 'Oh' and 'Oooh'?

About three inches

What's the difference between communism and capitalism?

In the former, man exploits man, in the latter, it's exactly the opposite.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

How long does it take light to travel from the sun to the earth?

Not nearly as long as it would take to travel around your mom.

What did justin beiber say to his mom?

I FOUND MY MICROSCOPE, now all I need is my lotion and tweezers

Dump Jokes More Dump Jokes

How Long Does It Take A Black Woman To Take A Dump?

9 months.

Where does the Lone Ranger take his trash?

To the dump, to the dump, to the dump, dump, dump.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a washing machine?

A washing machine won't follow you around after you dump your load in it.

How do you find Will Smith in the winter time?

follow the Fresh Prints!

Week Jokes More Week Jokes

Why did u shoot your wife ?

Judge:why did u shoot your wife instead of shootingher lover? Sardar:Your honour, it's easier to shoot a woman once, than shooting one man every week.

Why do you smell like weed?

Me: How do you know what weed smells like ! Busted, mister! You're grounded for a week. Dad: Okaayy :(

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What are you supposed to do when someone is having a seizure in the bath?

throw a load of dirty laundry in.

What do you do when you see someone having a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in a load of dirty laundry and some detergent.

Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

Why is the washing machine so grumpy?

It keeps getting agitated

What do a washing machine and a one night stand have in common?

a washing machine doesn't follow you around for a week after you put a load in it..