Where's the cake?

Mom of kid: We don't believe in sugar. Me: I promise it's real. I've seen it with my own eyes.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

Are you kidding That's a hardware problem!

What's the best thing about kids?

Making them!!!

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What's the difference between Biggie Smalls and your mom?

Biggie loves it when you call him Big Poppa, while your mom just loves it when you call.

How many times do I have to tell you this Mom?

I have thousands of fans who need to know my thoughts. So, no I can't take out the garbage.

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?

A: They don't have balls to scratch.

What's red and silver and bumps in to walls?

A baby with forks in it's eyes.

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

What do you call an old-school CIA agent who believes his work is none of the public's goddamn business?

A Pte-redact-yl

What do you call 2 ducks who walk like, act like, and believe they are geese?

A paradux

Promise Jokes More Promise Jokes

What is it good for?

Some people say "nothing", but my stock portfolio's looking promising.

How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Just one more guys I promise.

Sugar Jokes More Sugar Jokes

What's the difference between Sugar and Sweet'N Low?

Sugar is on the lips. :-)

Why won't you loan a neighbor a cup of sugar?

sigh "You're a pile of ants wearing a bathrobe." bathrobe sags dejectedly

Cake Jokes More Cake Jokes

What kind of tools do I need to make a cake?

Him: The fact that you're calling ingredients tools means u shouldnt be in charge of this.

What do French Business Men use to ice their cakes?

Franchicing