Whoa. There are books on TAPE?

Now I can stop reading while I drive. This is gonna save so many lives.

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Save Jokes More Save Jokes

What's the difference between Joe Paterno and Harambe?

Harambe tried to save the kids.

What can save a dying blonde?

A: Hair transplants.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the goat stop trying to break out of jail?

Because he was just tired of being an escape goat.

What stops your hair from falling?

The floor

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?

For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving...

What type of car does a Loch ness monster Drive?

A nissan

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

Why can't you find pirates in Kansas?

They all live in Arkansas

Why did the orange move to veggieland?

So he could live in peas and hominy.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why is Dave Mustaine described as "heavy metal"?

Because he sings lead. (Better read than said.)

How do computers learn to read?

C:/ Dos C:/ Dos Run Run Dos Run

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

What did Sean Connery say when his books fell on his head?

I blame my shelf

What do you have when you are having second thoughts about your booking on Native American land?

Reservation reservation reservations.

Tape Jokes More Tape Jokes

Why did this adhesive strip quit his work?

He just couldn't tape it anymore..

How does Planned Parenthood paint their walls?

They go to Home Depot, get paint and rollers Sometimes they hire private contractors Lots of paint and tarps and tape, it's not that fun