Why are we here?

Me: Philosophers still don't know 5: No, why are we HERE Wife: Your dad is lost and won't ask for directions

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What's a Tennessee tornado and a Texas divorce have in common?

Someone's gonna lose a trailer.

Why don't turkey vultures ever lose their luggage?

They only ...

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know the girl from Jaws had dandruff?

She left her Head &amp Shoulders on the beach

What is the irrational fear of Chuck Norris otherwise known as?

A completely rational fear.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's on at the cinema?

Wife: Let me google it and- *terrified look at bill* Wife: Let me bing it and see.

What did the man say after his wife was dragged off the beach by a seal?

Welp, seal ate her.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What do you call a dad without jeans?

A potato.

When dad Waits to see you on thanks giving Son:We just Ate Dad:OK so you can be here at 5?

Son:We'll see Son:how does the turkey smell Dad : I guess through its Beak

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What makes fish smell?

One fine morning in Eden, God was looking for Eve, but couldn't find them. God saw Adam and asked where Eve was? Adam replied, "She's down at the Ocean, taking a bath." "Damn," says God, "now all the fish will smell."

How many "can't"s can a white girl "can't" before she literally can't even?

my brother asked me this when i woke up and it has been bugging me all day.

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

What do you call 5 black guys and a white guy?

A basketball team. What do you call 9 black guys and a white guy? A baseball team. What do you call 11 black guys and a white guy? A football team. What do you call 100 black guys and a white guy? A cell block

Why was 5 afraid of 7?

Because 6, 7 8.(http://www.reocities.com/Area51/Meteor/9836/yoda/yodafunface2.jpg)

Philosopher Jokes More Philosopher Jokes

How do you get a philosopher off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza.

Why does the philosopher have an automatic car..?

Because he Kant drive Immanuel.

Direction Jokes More Direction Jokes

What directions did the ghost give the goblin?

A: "Make a fright turn at the corner."

What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction?

Jail break.