Why did the astronomer hit himself on the head in the afternoon?

He wanted to see stars during the day.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do Chinos say when you take them off?

This was incredibly clever when I first thought of it but then I did some research...the closest they get to being Italian is that George Clooney was a "pioneer" for them: Reading that makes me never want to wear them again.

What do Steam users and Reddit admins have in common?

They don't want to pay for mods.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

Why won't the Alzheimer's patient pay attention to you?

Because he doesn't know the time of day.

Which is the month in which women talk the least?

February... because it has the least number of days

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

Whats the last thing that goes through a fly's brain before it hits my car windshield?

Its arse.

Why did the music industry talent scout take a course in game programming?

He thought it would help him with his hit detection.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What does a monster do when he loses his head?

He calls a head hunter.

What's that terribly ugly thing on your shoulders?

Harry: Help! What is it Fred: Your head!

Star Jokes More Star Jokes

What movie did Leonardo DiCaprio's dog recently star in?

The Woof of Wall Street.

How do you start to politely tell someone that their God isn't in the stars?

Well... If it's any constellation..."

Afternoon Jokes More Afternoon Jokes

Why did the astronomer hit himself on the head in the afternoon?

He wanted to see stars during the day.

Why don't Deputy Fire Marshals look out the window in the morning?

A: So they have something to do in the afternoon.

Astronomer Jokes More Astronomer Jokes

Why are astronomers so popular with the ladies?

Chicks dig stars.

What do you get when astronomers play tic-tac-toe?

Exoplanets Thought that one up myself.