Bikini Jokes

Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

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What do you call a sheman wearing a bikini?

Flaccid

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

Why is it socially acceptable to wear a bikini at the beach but not on the bus?

At the end of the day I'm just a guy in a bikini on the bus.

How do you make the king leer?

Put the queen in a bikini! (From krusty the klown)

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Midnight Jokes More Midnight Jokes

How old?

Woman: "Thanks, she's 34 weeks. Do you have the time " Me: "Sure, it's 972 minutes past midnight."

What's the best way to hunt for deer?

Driving at midnight.

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

What do you call the people who make sandwiches at Subway?

Sub humans.

Lawn Chair Jokes More Lawn Chair Jokes

What is the first thing off the truck at a trailer fire?

A: Lawn chair.

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?

She wanted to get a dark tan.

Marvel Jokes More Marvel Jokes

Why is a bad government like a bikini?

Because people marvel at what's holding it up. And they wish it would fall.

Why was Nikola Tesla a fan of Marvel?

Because he didn't like DC...

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

What did the Psychiatrist say to the man who walked in wearing nothing but plastic wrap?

I can clearly see ur nuts.

Why couldn't the traffic light get a date?

She was wearing no turn on red. :

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What do you call a girl who only likes guys with big muscles?

A Biceptual

What do you call a guy who peeps his peeps?

A homeboyeur.

Clothe Jokes More Clothe Jokes

What clothes do lawyers wear to work?

Lawsuits.

Whats a fedora clad, neck bearded gentlemen's favorite color?

M'genta

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What do you do when you want to hold a bunny?

You grabbit.

How many Bernie supporters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One to hold the lightbulb, and the rest of the world to revolve around them