Comma Jokes

What's the difference between a cat and a comma?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one is a pause at the end of a clause.

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What is the difference between cats and commas?

This might be better suited for but I think its more a joke Cats have claws at the ends of it's paws commas haves pauses at the ends of its clause.

Why do the Germans use commas in place of decimal points?

Because it makes 6,000,000 seem like a much smaller number.

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5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

Why is he crying?

Me: That's a teardrop tattoo. 5: Oh. Did he shank someone in prison M: What 5: Remind him I want extra guacamole.

What are the 5 best Vegetables of all time?

tink about it. Gai lan, gai lan... gai lan, gai lan, and gai lan. (thanks to Chapelle show skit((making the band)))

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What us the difference between white, brown and black people?

The time God took to cook us

What's the difference between the England football team and a teabag?

The teabag stays longer in the cup.

Clause Jokes More Clause Jokes

Why was Mrs. Clause's stocking full on December 21st?

Because Santa came early this year.

What's the difference between a semicolon and a cat?

One has a pause at the end of it's clause, the other has claws at the end of it's paws.

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

What happened to the two zombies who went on a date?

They had a mantic** time.

Why did the raisin take the prune to the new year's ball?

Because he couldn't find a date!

Pause Jokes More Pause Jokes

How do you sell a chicken to a deaf man?

pause....) WANT TO BUY A CHICKEN??!! (SHOUTING)

What is a hemophiliac's least favorite song?

Don't stop ble-eding (The pause is necessary)

6000000 Jokes More 6000000 Jokes

What is a German's favorite number?

6000000

Why do the Germans use commas in place of decimal points?

Because it makes 6,000,000 seem like a much smaller number.

End Jokes More End Jokes

What is hairy on the outside, wet and fleshy on the inside, begins with C and ends with T, and has both a U and a N in it?

Coconut

What is dark and hairy on the outside, soft and moist on the inside, starts with a C, ends with a T, and has a U and an N in it?

A coconut

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

How do you make a song better using cement?

By remixing it.

Why do redditors make such good fencers?

They're used to dealing with ripostes.