Gate Jokes

Why did the vulture have to check some luggage at the gate?

It was only allowed one piece of carrion.

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What did the farmer say when the police found the gate from the public footpath in his barn and accused him of stealing?

That's not my stile.

What do you say to a person who calls a black fence a gate?

No, a fence.

What should you do if windows crashes cost you a lot of money?

A: You should bill Gates.

What vocation can transform anything into a gate?

A reporter.

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Accuse Jokes More Accuse Jokes

Why did Luke Skywalker get in trouble for using the Live Long and Prosper sign?

It's because he was accused of cultural appropriation.

What happened when Turkey was accused of being Chicken?

It staged a coup

Allow Jokes More Allow Jokes

Why aren't eagles allowed to be sick in america?

Because that would be illeagle

What side of the road do they drive on in ireland?

None. They're so drunk and violent no one is allowed to drive.

3.5 Inch Jokes More 3.5 Inch Jokes

How did Micro-soft get it's name?

Because Bill Gates has a 3.5 inch floppy

What's the trick to satisfying your wife or girlfriend with only 3.5 inches?

Visa or Mastercard?

Litter Jokes More Litter Jokes

What do you call a litter of Corgi puppies?

A Corgisbord.

What does Bill Gates call it when someone drops a $20 bill on the ground?

Littering.

Cloud Jokes More Cloud Jokes

What's white and drips from the cloud?

The coming of the Lord.

What does that cloud look like to you?

3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be 3-year-old: Rain.

Pope Jokes More Pope Jokes

What did the Pope say to the hot atheist girl?

Shake that blasphemy

How do Protestants like their orange juice?

without Pope

0 Jokes More 0 Jokes

Why can you never get caught with a 0 in math?

because cot(0) doesn't exist ... This joke... it burns my eyes...

Why did Fetty Wap chose that as his stage name?

Because he wanted to make $50K per day from ad revenue.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

What number is higher than infinity?

420

Why didn't the number 4 get into the nightclub?

Because he is 2 square.