Progress Jokes

What's the opposite of progress?

congress.

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What do you call a lamppost in Niger?

Progress.

What is the opposite of progress?

colgatereally)Congress.

What's the opposite of pro?

Con. So what's the opposite of progress

What can you say to your trainer that will compliment then on your progress and also be wildly inappropriate?

You make me hard

What is the opposite of pro?

Con. What is the opposite of progress Congress.

What's been in the works for 7000 days and has barely made any progress?

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Niger Jokes More Niger Jokes

What do you call a lamppost in Niger?

Progress.

What do you call a black person from Niger?

A Nigerian, you racist

Song Jokes More Song Jokes

What song do turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day?

God save the kin Happy Thanksgiving!

How do you know Justin Bieber is Canadian?

Only a Canadian could get a #1 on Billboard with a song called Sorry.

Democrat Jokes More Democrat Jokes

What's the difference between a republican and a democrat?

How much damage can their Weiner make...

Why did the Wisconsin democrat cry?

A: He couldn't recall.

Compliment Jokes More Compliment Jokes

How do you compliment a girl with a cold sore?

You tell her that her smile is contagious.

What does Mrs. pancake say when you compliment her on her weight?

Thank you, I'm flattened! I made this joke up on my drive home and am very proud of it. You monkeys better find it funny!

Reach Jokes More Reach Jokes

Why do birds fly to the tropics in winter?

Why, wouldn't the winter be over by the time they reach, if they walk all the way along? So they fly.

What do short people call something that's too high up?

Absolute zero, because it's impossible to reach

Insurance Company Jokes More Insurance Company Jokes

Which insurance company does Bernie Sanders use?

Progressive.

What did the insurance company say to the applicant?

THIS ISN'T EVEN MY FINAL FORM!

Congress Jokes More Congress Jokes

What do you call a group of Idiots?

Congress

What's the opposite of progress?

congress.

Sjw Jokes More Sjw Jokes

Why do SJWs hate Pong?

It's a wildly successful game that only has straight, white main characters (I stole this joke from somewhere but am not allowed to say where)

What do you get if you cross a SJW and Jason Voorhees?

Social justice.