Samsung Jokes

How do you get a Samsung owner to throw their phone out the window?

End your text with "this message will self destruct in 10 seconds"

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Why does mohamed goes out with an explosive device?

To bring it back to samsung, you racist.

Why was Amazon angry after their conference with Samsung?

After taking Notes, they realized their was no way they could sell the Fire.

Why can't a Samsung be disguised as an iPhone?

Because eventually, its cover would be blown.

What did Samsung say to Apple?

You don't no jack!

Why are Samsung phones so popular?

Because you C4 of them exploding every day

What do you call the security at a Samsung store?

Guardians of the Galaxy, or firefighters.

What is Samsung's next Note series phone after Note 7?

Samsung Not Explode

What do you call the security guards outside a Samsung factory?

Guardians of the Galaxy

What do you call a security guard stationed outside of a Samsung?

A Guardian of the Galaxy

How do you know if someone has a Samsung phone without asking?

Don't worry, they've already told you the superior qualities it has over all the other smart phones by this time.

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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung?

The guardians of the galaxy!

Who sung?

Sam. Samsung

Why did Samsung make the Galaxy Note 7 waterproof?

It can't catch fire underwater... I think.

What do you call the security guards outside Samsung shops?

Guardians of the Galaxy

How does Samsung know its most loyal customers?

They check with the burn ward. (I'll get my coat)

Why did Samsung call it the Galaxy Note 7?

Because "Kindle" was taken.

What do you call a security guard who works at Samsung?

a Guardian of the Galaxy

What do you call a group of security guards in front of a Samsung store?

Guardians of the Galaxy.

What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops?

Guardians of the galaxy

Who are the real Guardians of the Galaxy?

Security at Samsung.

What is Samsung PR team's Christmas jingle you ask?

The phone we gave you is frightful, But the fire is so delightful ; And since we have no replace to go, Let it blow! Let it blow! Let it blow!

What do you call Samsung store security guards?

Guardians of the Galaxy.

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Why do pills bottles have cotton in them?

So they can remind black people the picked cotton before they sold drugs.

How much do cosmetics sell for?

Face value.

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What happens when you cross a mountain climber with a mosquito?

Nothing, you can't cross a vector with a scaler.

What happens when someone mixes Francium, Oxygen, Tungsten, and Nitrogen after it explodes?

The chemist may frown.

Note Jokes More Note Jokes

Why don't southern belles go to orgies any more?

Too many thank you notes to write

Who would still buy a Note 7 after all the controversy?

A Muslim

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Why was Windows Vista afraid of 7?

Because Windows 7 8 9.

Why is there no Windows 9?

Because 7 8 9.

Samsung Phone Jokes More Samsung Phone Jokes

Why are Samsung phones so popular?

Because you C4 of them exploding every day

How do you know if someone has a Samsung phone without asking?

Don't worry, they've already told you the superior qualities it has over all the other smart phones by this time.

Follower Jokes More Follower Jokes

Why did voldermort used Twitter instead of Facebook?

Because he only had followers. Not friends.

Why haven't you introduced me to your followers yet?

Are you ashamed of me

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What did the Japanese Journey covers band sing at the funeral?

Don't stop, bereaving!

What do you call an epileptic covered in lettuce?

A seizure salad.

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

What's your favorite joke appropriate for a 6-8 year old?

I am a ski instructor and I've recently been teaching these two boys who are 6 and 8 year old brothers. I realized today that I know zero jokes appropriate enough or funny to this demographic. I feel like they think I am super boring. Give me some help to make the chairlift more exciting!!

Why did the janitor take early retirement?

Because he realized that grime doesn't pay.